a few things that scare me about toddlers... Specifically my toddler

1. The average energy output of a two year old is roughly equal to one atomic bomb

2. My son consistently eats more in one sitting than my wife. That's OK for now, but is frightening when looking at future grocery bills.

3. He is getting taller but is not gaining any weight. He still weighs the same as he did prior to the summer months.

4. Do you want to know what the most annoying sound in the world is? Come over to my house while we're trying to put Christian to bed.

5. I was a stubborn child. Bekah was a stubborn child. Christian inherited it from both of us. Here's how the math works: stubborn + stubborn = a force requiring patience of heroic proportions. Mules have nothing on Christian. Thankfully, I'm way bigger than he is.

6. Christian is a bully. I'm not sure how it happened. I never was a bully, so I'm not sure how to relate. If any of you were bullies in your youth, any advice would be appreciated.

7. Christian does not like toys. But he loves electrical wires, cell phones, and remote controls.

8. Feed milk products to lactose intolerant toddlers at your own risk. The end result is not pleasant. Trust me.

9. While thumbing through photos of my fathers childhood, I found a picture of my dad that looked exactly like Christian. Dear son, you're such a cute kid. I am sorry, but you will grow up to look just like me and grampa. Genetics is such a humbling thing.

10. Christian's idea of gently petting the dog is grabbing a leg or ear and pulling as hard as possible. He does this while saying "soft." We're trying to get him to be softer with animals. It might be time for a new tactic. Thankfully, Psuchen takes it like an invalid.

11. Christian's two favorite words are goggy (doggy) and biguck (big truck). Unfortunately the way he says truck sounds like a part of the human anatomy. Makes sense when you know what he's talking about and extremely helpful when he points at a big truck.

12. Bekah and I have managed to teach Christian how to say thuggin'. There really should be rules about who's allowed to procreate.

13. Christian can destroy his room in 1/4th the time that it takes to clean it up.

14. He is a very agreeably child. Ask him anything and he'll agree with you, even if he really doesn't. i.e. Are you hungry? He says "hungee" and nods his head but won't eat. Are you thirsty? "Terty" nods head but won't drink. Are you tired? "Ty-rrrrd" but he won't go to bed. Do you want to cuddle with daddy? "Cudzle" He nods his head but screams the instant I pick him up. This goes on for quite some time until I ask are you a purple elephant? "Elfint," he says while nodding. Finally, are you thuggin'? "THUGGIN'" at this point he grins like a fool and runs off to do whatever it is that toddlers do.

15. Life with a toddler is lived through little breaks between moments of chaos. Strangely, I can't imagine life without it.

16. My alarm clock is made of flesh and blood. He goes off about 6:00am every morning. There is no snooze button.

17. Problem solving is not a problem, especially when it is a problem he's not supposed to solve.

18. Honestly, I think he speaks Yiddish. Maybe Hebrew.

19. Christian acts his age. Unfortunately, he's two.

20. Christian has his own profile set up for Halo. Too bad he doesn't understand the controls.

21. He's a crazy miniature version of me, but I still love him. All I want is the best for him, even when he's acting like a toddler.


Happy 'Talk Like a Pirate Day'

No, really... today is 'Talk Like a Pirate Day.' I'm not making it up.

If you don't believe me, check out this site.

And this site.

Or this one.


What am I missing?

The following was taken from an AP artical "Iraq al-Qaida says pope, West are doomed"

The Mujahedeen Shura Council, an umbrella organization of Sunni Arab extremist groups that includes al-Qaida in Iraq, issued a statement on a Web forum vowing to continue its holy war against the West. The authenticity of the statement could not be independently verified.

The group said Muslims would be victorious and addressed the pope as "the worshipper of the cross" saying "you and the West are doomed as you can see from the defeat in Iraq, Afghanistan, Chechnya and elsewhere. ... We will break up the cross, spill the liquor and impose head tax, then the only thing acceptable is a conversion (to Islam) or (killed by) the sword."

I could be wrong, but if you ask me it seems more and more as if the pope spoke truth.

No, I don't fully understand Islam. And I won't pretend to. But if you are going to protest against someone who describes your religion as violent, reacting with violence might not be the wisest way to do so. If you don't like the pope saying that your religion is spread by the sword and you want to prove him wrong, you probably shouldn't threaten the use of the sword.

Now, don't get me wrong. Not every anti-vatican protest has been violent or threatening in nature. 200 Muslims participated in a sit in organized in Damascus. That is how it should be done. If Islamic protesters wanted to rid themselves of their violent image they should look for more peaceful methods of protest. Continued violence, threats, and hateful messages does nothing but fuel the steotype that most westerners believe as true.


She's kidding, right?

During a conversation about hunting, one guy mentioned that he couldn't bring himself to kill any animal, however he does enjoy trap shooting.

A girl sitting next to him gasped in horror before saying, "That's so cruel. Why would you trap an animal and then shoot it."


Has it really been that long?

One year ago, Bekah and I had just moved in to a new apartment. Between boxes, baby, dog, and trying to get settled we had ignored any significant events across the nation.

Two years ago, I had just moved to the Coeur d’Alene area. Christian had just been born, I was acclimating to a new job, new people, and new surroundings. The rules of life were being rewritten. The first couple of months here were blurry.

Three years ago we lived in Sioux Falls. There was a memorial event that I wanted to go to, but we never made it, yet now… I’m not sure why.

Four years ago Bekah and I were engaged and beginning to plan our wedding. We lived In Boise. I wore a blue oxford shirt over a red t-shirt and white pants to work. I felt as if that day was important and we were all apart of something that would be remembered. I was working at DirecTV, and oddly, it was just another day. We observed a minute of silence at the right time, and the TVs in the center were tuned into anniversary coverage. But customers called in with questions about their bill or services just like they would have on any other day.

Sometime that day, I typed up a short letter that I e-mailed out to everyone I knew. You can find a slightly amended version of that letter on my other blog.

Five years ago, I woke up in a different world. I had woke up (earlier than normal) and settled into my routine of watching whatever looked interesting on TV before getting ready for work. The night before I had fallen asleep watching the most boring thing I could think of, FOX news. I turned on the TV just in time to watch the south tower fall.

I called my best friend Steve, and told him to turn on the TV. But at that obsene hour of the morning he wanted to kill me for waking him up. "Why" he asked. I said "Trust me, just turn it on" and hung up. He called me back about two minutes later.

Normally I'd only watch TV for about a half hour before eating breakfast or taking a shower. But that morning I couldn't draw myself away from the TV. I was working at Old Navy at the time, but I didn't have to be there till noon. I drove out there but thankfully, they had the good sense to close the store for the day. Who in their right mind would want to go shopping during a national tragedy.

But has it really been five years? It seems as if it was a whole lifetime ago. Nothing has really changed in our national culture. No shift in the way we think or act. It's almost as if the real tragedy is not the act of terror, but a lack of change since then. We are still the same bunch of greedy prideful Americans we always have been.


He's two... (finally)

Today is Christian's second birthday. We're throwing a party for him. Last year, he had one friend come over. This year it's two. Gee, I can't wait till he's 12.

For those of you who can't be here, wish him a happy b-day. If you post a comment for him, I'll make sure to read them to him. (Though, I might wait until he brings home his first girlfriend, but I will read it to him.)


random fact

When I was little, if I heard someone use the term "prima donna" I thought they were really saying "pre-Madonna." They say "She's such a prima donna." I think, hmmm, she's older than MTV.


Happy Monday... er, Tuesday!

Three things to help get your week going upon return from the holiday.

First, Christian is learning how to use utensils when eating. This is a good thing because now, he will be able to shovel food into his own mouth. Apparently, I cannot do it fast enough. He is a vary smart kid, he knows where his food belongs. Before, if food fell astray from the spoon I was holding Christian would grab it off his plate and proceed to shove fist and food into his mouth. But this weekend, we wanted to let him use his spoon on his own to eat his mac & cheese with peas. (Don't ask, it's one of Bekah's favorite combinations.) This time instead of treating fallen food as finger food, he would pick the cheesy pasta up, put it back in the bowl, and try again.

I believe the origin of the phrase "getting your foot in the door" had something to do with elevators. The elevators at my place of employment will bump your shoulder if you walk though it while it's closing. The door will nearly chop your hand off if you try to keep it from closing with a trust of your arm. However, if you stick your foot into the path of the closing door, it will magically reopen. Occasionally, as I watch people exit the elevator from the far end of the hall, I want to shout "Go, go gadget-leg" just so I can get my foot through the door. This mad rush to get to the elevator would not be an issue if it wasn't for the fact that our elevator is slower than glacial recession.

And finally. I have nixed the idea of going to Nepal. The trip was postponed, and logistically wasn't a possibility for me. However I will be opting for a different trip a little closer to home that both Bekah and I can do. Tentatively, we'll be going to New Orleans October 26th-30th to assist a church and surrounding community in the ongoing rebuilding process. We will be doing some fund raising to go, and we don't have all of the trip's details yet, but we will shortly. As soon as we have those details, you will all know.

Well, that's all that I have for now. I do have to save some brain functionality for work.