11.27.2007

...and the winter storm coverage begins!

Like good and faithful stewards of public interests, local news crews were out on the scene last night covering vehicle accidents across the inland empire as the winter's first snow began to cover the area. Ahhh, it's my favorite time of year.

The first collision reported involved a police officer who was rear ended while sitting at a stop sign. Wow, sucks to be the guy who hit the cop. Kudos to the officer, who was able to write the easiest traffic violation ticket in his career.

Speaking of the weather... KXLY's forecast called for snow today, none tomorrow, and light snow Thursday with partial clouds the rest of the week. KREM predicted no snow today, snow tomorrow and heavy snow Thursday with a possibility of snow through the week end. Who will be correct? Find out next week! I sure hope KREM wins.

(This is starting to sound like a cheesy reality show - " The Next Great Accurate American Meteorologist." NOTE TO ALL NETWORKS: if you happen to create a reality show for competing weather forecasters in lieu of the continuing writer's strike - I thought of it first; I want part of the profits.)

11.21.2007

This year, I'm thankful that there are not turkeys falling from the sky

Maybe this is what Chicken Little was talking about. Have a happy thanks giving.


11.08.2007

The oddities of Sesame Street

As a father of a toddler, I am slowly getting reacquainted with the citizens of Sesame Street. It is a great show when you look at the basics. The show has talented writers who strongly grasp themes important for kids to learn and present it all in a way that does not annoy the parents who monitor what their kids watch. (Although, judging from their knack for parody and subtle humor, I would assume that much of Sesame Street's writing staff has way too much free time.)

Yet the more Christian watches Sesame Street, the more I begin to notice some unintended quirks. Here are some examples.

1. Am I the only one who notices the similarities between Elmo and Comedy Central's character Special Ed?



Maybe it's because they both say "YAAAAAAYY!" a lot. Or maybe it is the similar IQ level.
2. Big Bird is a pot-head. Really. He is too fascinated by simple things to be drug free.
3. Mr. Noodle is a child molester. C'mon - just look at the mustache - it screams CHIMO! The outfit (obnoxious bow tie, 70's era vest, pleated pants pulled too far above the waist line), the awful hair piece, every thing about him is downright creepy. He winks a lot, makes funny faces, and loiters outside of a young boy's bedroom window - pervert. SERIOUSLY! Every time I see Mr. Noodle I think that man is a convicted sex offender. And to top it off, he leads with his hip. (In theater character studies, we were taught how to portray personality in the way we walked: if your character is intelligent - lead with the forehead, if your character is prideful - lead with your chest. Characters who lead with their hip or any part of their pelvic region when they walk are lustful and motivated by sex. Not really the mental image I want to see when Elmo's World is over.
4. Bert is evil. I won't go into details, but I truly pity Ernie.
5. There is significant cultural diversity on Sesame Street. I think it is important for kids to see diversity celebrated in such a healthy and productive manor. However, I am noticing a trend in their quest for diversity. The minority kids on the show seem to be normal healthy children. The vast majority of the Latino, African American, and Asian kids seem to be typical kids (ignoring the outdated wardrobes). But the white kids? It seems like the majority of the white kids on the show have some sort of mental or physical handicap. OK, I know us white folk can't dance, and we may look goofy, but there are some of us that appear normal. Eh, maybe I'm just being too sensitive.
6. Honestly, Sesame Street is a wonderfully educational experience. Yet there is one bad habit that Sesame Street seems to propagate: bad table manners. Thank you Cookie Monster, due to your influence my son eats like a wood chipper. Aside from the poor table manners, Christian is remembering more of his shapes and colors, and quickly gaining mastery of the alphabet and - thanks to The Count - numbers & counting.
Speaking of The Count, how cool is it that there is a Vampire on Sesame Street? Not to mention one who commands such a devilishly good laugh - ah ah ah.

11.05.2007

The new puppy

The new puppy is home after a week at the vet. The battle over Parvo is not quite over, but she is getting stronger. Now she needs a name, and you can help us with that. Just tell us which of these three names you like best.

1. Terata (Ter-aht-ah: means Marvel or Wonder - often translated into Miracle)

2. Antagoni (An-tag-ohn-ee: shortened from the word antagonizomenoi- which means struggling against)

3. Elpida (El-peed-ah: means Hope)

Vote: 1. Terata, 2. Antagoni, or 3. Elpida

11.04.2007

Now I really don't want to

While walking through the grocery store this morning, I saw a disturbing display. The rice cakes were on a shelf next to the feminine hygiene products.

Because I needed more reasons to not want to eat rice cakes.