Cornucopia

I've mentioned before the varied fragrances that inhabit my workplace.

Today, my office was a cornucopia of puzzling scents. The basement smelled like popcorn and curly fries (not surprising since the basement houses our lunch room and someone left an uneaten bag from Arby's one one of the tables). The elevators smelled like a combination of body odor and nachos. As bad as you could imagine a cheesy armpit to smell, the elevator was preferable when compared to the rest of the building.

The operations area smelled like poo. This effluent smell varied as you walked from one end of the building to the other; ranging from non-existent to someone-just-passed-gas to chicken-manure. I do not know the cause of the stank; it is an olfactory mystery. Before you assume I was imagining things, I must clarify one bit of trivia. I graduated from a school that had been nicknamed cow-pie high. My nose is attuned to putrid smells of methane, and I was not the only one to notice it. Thankfully the air around my desk was relatively free of derriere.

If there was one surprising haven within the wasteland assaulting aromas, it was the stairwell. The dank and dusty stench that one would expect in a typical stairwell was replaced with what smelled like vanilla hand lotion and chamomile tea. Again, I can not fathom the source of vanilla and chamomile. However, if I could find a way to move my cubicle into the stairwell... I would have done it.