Recipe for a beautiful disaster

As I write this the Inland Northwest is blanketed under a lovely pile of frozen precipitation, Highway 95 is a mess, sections of I-90 are shut down due to spun out cars, and Spokane authorities are dealing with a 17 car pile-up on the South Hill. Ah, snow. The strange dichotomy of beautiful scenery and merciless carnage.

I'm not sure how much of the chaos could have been negated. It's not like we didn't know this was coming. It's not like every meteorologist from every major network predicted a hefty winter storm. Oh, wait. It was forecast. We had ample warning.

So, here's a five step recipe for disaster in the face of post-card worthy weather.

1. Wait until there is 4 to 8 inches of snow on the ground before reacting.

2. Keep plowing to a minimum. Allow local traffic to melt, compact, and/or slushify the snow covered roadways.

3. Do not sand. Avoid all de-icing measures.

4. Spend the day watching feather textured flakes fall from the sky while temperatures hover at 32°.

5. Continue to do nothing to improve road conditions as temperatures drop into the teens, turning every paved surface into a skating rink for 4,000 pound metallic beasts.

ps: if slushify isn't a real word, it should be.