will forever be laughing

Occasionally, somebody says or does something so completely ridiculous and logic defying that you don't know how to react. One of my fellow trainers had one of those events in her class yesterday.

Disclaimer: the subject of this post is a good guy. He is friendly, easy to get along with, artistic, conversational, and he breeds tarantulas. Please don't get me wrong, this post is not a complaint or a soapbox to preach against American idiocy. I am writing for the value of humor. I have been laughing about this for the past five hours, perhaps you will also find this funny.

The story begins yesterday when Peter Parker (not his real name but a thinly veiled pop culture reference) called in sick. His wife is also a coworker and his trainer asked his wife whether or not Peter Parker would be in. His wife explained that Peter's spider had died over the weekend and he wasn't feeling well enough to come in to work. Yes, I said spider. I wasn't kidding when I said he breeds tarantulas.

That in itself is mildly funny, but the real kicker comes after class when everyone had gone home for the day. His trainer sat down at her desk and checked the daily log created from our sick line to see his reason for not coming in. Apparently, when Peter Parker called the sick line, he requested FMLA to care for a sick child.

First problem, you can't get FMLA until after a year with an employer. Second, a dead spider does not count as a sick child.

Again, I'm not trying to abuse Peter Parker's character, but highlighting the humor in life. I do empathize for him. When Psuchen dies I will be very sad, but I will go to work the next day. I will probably be depressed the next day, but I will go. As much as you may love and care for an animal, when all is said and done, it is just a pet.

FMLA... HA! I so needed something to laugh at today.


  1. FMLA!!! That almost beats the one I had! Wait, this is over a "pet" not a twin sister in jail! Never mind. NO! I still win, but only if he is returning to work after his FMLA time is over. As for my "twin sister in jail" person, she quit that day. So, if he comes back...never mind, I can't stop laughing.

  2. Over a spider? Did he cuddle with that trantula? Was it trained to follow commands? Did the trantula ever fetch him his slippers or retrieve the newspaper from the front lawn? He may be a nice guy or whatever, but he must be a pretty bold dude, to not only call in sick, but to claim FMLA as a reason for his absence. That is way too funny! I actually lauged out loud as I read that. I gotta tell my hubby that one.

  3. HELP HELP that is great! is his spouse also aka miss muffett?