1.17.2018

Something about timing ...

It was summer when Annie and I started dating. Our first date was on July 23rd. It was a Friday. The next date was on a Saturday. Then another Saturday. A month later we went on a Tuesday evening hike on Tubbs Hill. Exactly one month later. August 23rd.

That date was significant because it was the night we decided we wanted a serious relationship with each other. Not just dating, but something more. Something deeper. From the first date to the evening beside Lake Coeur d'Alene, it took us exactly 31 days to decide we each saw something in the other that we wanted in our lives.

We spent a lot of time just the two of us. Dinners. Walks in a park. Movies. Several philosophical, religious, political, and personal conversations. We did not publicize the relationship on social media at first because we wanted to be sure we were grounded together before telling the whole world. We also waited a few months before introducing each other to the friends we hung out with before dating. Three months to be exact. It was August 23rd when two of my best friends gathered with us for a bonfire at Annie's house.

A first date in July, commitment in August, introduction of friends in October. Each on the 23rd of their respective months.

So much of what we believe and value line up. Our strategies for parenting. Our attitudes about money and finances. Our love languages and the way we communicate with each other. Our opinions about laws and what they should or should not be. Our tastes in music, sports, and entertainment.

Even the foods we love and hate are similar. We both dislike seafood of any kind. We both despise stuffing and cranberry sauce at holiday dinners. We both consider Ming Wah as our favorite Chinese restaurant. When we go out to eat, it's easy to find a meal to share because there will always be something on the menu we both like. During an early date at MOD Pizza, we both ordered pepperoni and pineapple pizzas; the only difference between us is she placed her order with tomatoes and red sauce while I got cilantro and red onions on BBQ sauce.

We are a lot alike. However, Annie and I are not identical people. She is far craftier, better at Scrabble, and a talented photographer. I'm the writer with a stronger preference for spicy foods. She's a country girl and I am a textbook nerd. We are not twins. Between the similarities and differences, we compliment each other.

With so much in common, it only makes sense the significant days in our relationship also share something in common.

We got engaged this last weekend. I admitted I would be a fool to endlessly date such a wonderful woman without a ring and she accepted my proposal. It was a beautiful moment, uniquely perfect for our family.


Monday, while we ate dinner, Annie shared an observation. "You know we have a thing about months, right?" I didn't understand what she meant at first. She clarified it was about timing. "We became official exactly a month after the first date. And I met some of your friends on the same date a couple months later. Everything was on the 23rd."

Ah, I knew what she was talking about. Then she continued. "Do you realize you proposed exactly one month before Valentine's Day?"

Nope. Truth is, I hadn't thought about it. Definitely didn't plan it to be like that. We just have something about timing.

Naturally, when a couple move from dating to engaged, the most frequently asked question is when. When is the wedding date? This is a question neither of us made much preemptive effort to resolve. It is not the most urgent issue to us. Yet we have something about timing so Monday night, we discussed it.

So, mark your calendars. Tentatively speaking. August 23rd, 2020. It is a Sunday. While not set in stone, the idea of getting married exactly four years to the day after the moment we agreed to make us us is wildly romantic. Besides, we have a thing about timing.

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